


Personal Space

by tangerine (arte)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Season/Series 04, Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 17:35:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7277425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arte/pseuds/tangerine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"No, that's not- God, I mean I need to like <em>breathe</em>, you know?"</p><p>Cas feels exasperated. Dean is not very good at explaining the concept of personal space. </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p>Or, personal space and Cas, throughout the seasons.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Personal Space

When Castiel first showed himself to Dean in his vessel, he chose not to appear directly in front of him, fearing that he might crush the righteous man to death by landing too close. Castiel knew that it was a ridiculous thing to worry about - he was now 'human sized' and was less likely to cause damage - but after the disastrous attempt at communication earlier, he wasn't willing to risk it.

As Castiel grew more comfortable in his vessel, he began to land closer to Dean. The two of them often ended up standing toe to toe during their conversation anyway, and Castiel thought it'd be more efficient to have the distance reduced from the beginning. 

Evidently, Dean doesn't share this sentiment.

"...I don't understand," Castiel says after Dean's poor attempt at explaining the concept of personal space.

Dean waves his hands around, frustrated. "Just, keep it to the arm's length at least, alright? I need to breathe."

"Your respiratory system functions fine," Castiel points out, trying to show Dean how ridiculous he is being. "My proximity would hardly deprive you of necessary oxygen."

"No, that's not- God, I mean I need to like _breathe_ , you know?"

Repeating the same word twice doesn't magically make the meaning clear. Castiel thinks Dean is being deliberately obtuse. After all, it seems hardly reasonable to make a fuss about 'personal space' when Dean had willingly walked close to Castiel multiple times in the past. If 'personal space' is so dear to Dean, shouldn't he respect Castiel's too?

Given enough time, Castiel is sure he can win this argument. However, with the prospect of the apocalypse looming close, they shouldn't be wasting time on such trivial matter.

 _Humans and their idiosyncrasies_ , Castiel thinks, exasperated, but moves on. It's not difficult. He's already done this several times after meeting Dean Winchester.

"I still don't understand but _I_ won't stand too close," Castiel says at last. 

"Good." Dean nods. Castiel feels mildly disappointed that his subtle jab seems to have been lost on Dean.

 

#

When the angels come to him for undigging the conspiracy to start the Apocalypse, Castiel briefly wonders how they'd react to him requesting personal space from their grabby hands.

 

#

Raphael doesn't react well.

 

#

Raphael is now walking the Earth, and Castiel needs Dean's help.

"Cas, we talked about this? Personal space?"

Castiel is a bit mystified upon hearing this. For one, he honestly thought that Dean had gotten over his hang-ups on personal space not long after his first speech, as the distance between the two of them hardly changed afterward.

Furthermore, Castiel might have been the one who appeared behind Dean, but he was not the one who chose to turn _toward_ Castiel, ensuring that there'd be close to no space between them. If Dean wanted to avoid this situation, the easiest thing for him to do would have been to step away, since Castiel's position was clear to see through the mirror.

Still, Castiel says, "My apologies," and steps back. 

They have a mission.

 

#

Dean insists on driving.

 _Humans and their idiosyncrasies,_ Castiel sighs. 

 

#

If car ride felt confining, riding a bus is ten times worse. Castiel thinks of the importance of his own personal space for the first time when people jostles too close to him. 

He's no longer vast. He's not lightning and power. He's stuck in this tiny vessel too fragile for the war that is about to come, and it won't stop aching. The inescapability of others' presence only rubs him further raw.

 _I need to breathe,_ Dean once said.

Castiel thinks he understands.

 

#

Castiel doesn't estimate his chance of survival to be very high, but he catches himself wondering if this is how he'd have to spend the rest of his life, as a human.

Daydreaming, he believes it is called.

In the very unlikely future where everyone survives, Castiel thinks he'd have to ask Dean for further guidance on how to act human. 

Maybe they could even learn together. Castiel remembers how Dean just gawked and shuffled closer when Castiel appeared before his eyes while still on phone. Dean refused to hang up first, which confused Castiel to no end.

That couldn't have been the right etiquette. Dean needs to learn, too.

But before anything else, they have to stop the world from ending.

 

#

Everyone survived.

Well, Castiel brought back Bobby, cured Dean, and raised Sam from the cage. It counts as everyone surviving.

Yet the war isn't over, and Castiel is still an angel.

Unseen, Castiel watches Dean raking leaves. Compared to the last time Castiel saw him, Dean looks peaceful, his raw wound healing.

 _Personal space, room to breathe,_ Castiel thinks.

He turns, and decides to leave Dean alone.


End file.
